Instantly and Not at All explores the nature of a recurring motive swallowed by chaos with

visions of grief in its grasp. I’ve chosen to exercise elements of the same, but not

the same and collage with exploration of layered vocal textures, and the colors that emerge from this experimentation. The piece is bookended with heavy exhales where whispered tone clusters splinter into the silence. Sporadic click tones emerge from the breath. The vibraphone enters, soon to be

followed by the marimba, which presents the sole traditional notational motive indicated on the score. This theme is repeated throughout the piece in various variations. Initially, it can be heard in the marimba, but continues to change in timbre, instrumentation, length, and intervals.

The motive continues to emerge in its evolved forms in vocal trills and in the vibraphone, xylophone, bells, and lute. A high pitched vocal cackling also emerges with the click tones at the start to set a drone for the length of the piece. These layers are meant to be forgotten as more layers add to the texture of the piece, until the end where the listener’s awareness of these foundations are brought back when returning to the the scape of breathiness. 

Isolated three part harmonies singing “strife” enter four times throughout the piece to provide a sense of forward motion and the heaviness not only of breath, but of mind. More three part harmonies emerge singing “it seems like yesterday I saw you, instantly I knew you”. This line is another nod to the literal settings of the same, but not the same. The three voices are not in sync. There is a slight delay, which adds an irony to the contradicting line. The line “it seems like” applies an approximation of time and expression, and the second line “instantly I knew you”, switching intent and tense. Instead of recording three separate recordings, I recorded one line, and changed the pitch of the other two - another symbolic nod to the concept of same, but not the same. An ascending sliding tone in another vocal layer builds the climax, along with a rhythmic marimba section, bells, vibraphone, xylophone, and lute. Once it reaches its climax, the rhythmic elements of the piece ceases, returning it to a state of aimless exploration.